Yesterday I explained to my 6 year old that communication is not just hearing the words people said and acting like that’s all they meant. I explained that when he speaks, I try to think about what made him say that and what he might have meant, and when people make this extra little effort to understand it’s like they’re giving you a gift of understanding. I was also able to help him recognize that when people use your words against you, it feels bad.
I’m prepared to have to repeat this several more times as per usual, but he did understand and agree. Taking people’s words at face value without thinking about the person isn’t good communication. Maybe it’s harder for you, or maybe you just stopped caring because enough NTs didn’t give you the gift of understanding. I’m just here to say that words at face value isn’t the be-all of connecting with others.
Isn’t it bad communication to not be straightforward and expect people to guess your meaning? Or to assume things of others that they didn’t say?
Not criticizing or anything just interesting to see a different perspective. I have been constantly tripped up by this throughout my life, and nobody ever told me what you told that child before.
I always say what I mean, and it can be frustrating to have people react in seemingly random ways because they inferred a hidden meaning that wasn’t there.
Yesterday I explained to my 6 year old that communication is not just hearing the words people said and acting like that’s all they meant. I explained that when he speaks, I try to think about what made him say that and what he might have meant, and when people make this extra little effort to understand it’s like they’re giving you a gift of understanding. I was also able to help him recognize that when people use your words against you, it feels bad.
I’m prepared to have to repeat this several more times as per usual, but he did understand and agree. Taking people’s words at face value without thinking about the person isn’t good communication. Maybe it’s harder for you, or maybe you just stopped caring because enough NTs didn’t give you the gift of understanding. I’m just here to say that words at face value isn’t the be-all of connecting with others.
Isn’t it bad communication to not be straightforward and expect people to guess your meaning? Or to assume things of others that they didn’t say?
Not criticizing or anything just interesting to see a different perspective. I have been constantly tripped up by this throughout my life, and nobody ever told me what you told that child before.
I always say what I mean, and it can be frustrating to have people react in seemingly random ways because they inferred a hidden meaning that wasn’t there.