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Cake day: July 1st, 2023

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  • During the winter war, the Russian army was approaching a forest. From the woods someone shouted “One Finn can defeat ten Russians!”

    The Russian commander smirked and sent in ten men. After a brief hail of gunfire, the same voice shouted “One Finn can defeat twenty Russians!”

    Getting frustrated, the Russian commander sent in 25 of his best soldiers. There was a protracted battle, then silence. After a minute, the tired voice shouted “One Finn can defeat fifty Russians!”

    Now furious, the Russian commander pulls up a force of two hundred men and sends them into the woods. Gunfire erupts, trees are ripped to shreds by explosions, and hell was unleashed. After what seemed like hours, a single Russian soldier staggered from the woods, bleeding badly. He looks at what’s left of the army and desperately screams “It’s a trap! There’s TWO of them!”







  • Tip for people thinking about coming to Syttende Mai in Ballard:

    Don’t drive. Don’t even think about it. On the tiny off chance you find a parking spot within five miles, you’re just gonna get sideswiped by a drunk 70-year-old named Nils. If you’re far away, park somewhere around Greenwood and Holman and take the D line down.